Not Ready to Let Go

There are times when I've felt that I'm not ready to let go or move on. This is a common feeling for people, and it can be surrounding a few things. Some are not ready to let go of relationships, jobs, hometowns, places.

At my first job, a well-meaning manager told me that "you shouldn't get attached to people, jobs, or places". At the time, it made perfect sense. I was in high school, had about two years left, and I was at a job that I thought would be mine through college. I wasn't attached to my coworkers; we didn't really connect on a personal level. It made sense to not get attached in that situation. However, the pandemic hit less than 5 months after I started working there, and the store was deemed "unessential". From one day to the next, it temporarily closed, and we were left to wait for it to open and have our jobs again. I realized then than I'd gotten more attached than expected, but it was out of my control.

At this point in my life, I am more than aware that I am attached, invested, connected, and in love with where I'm at. And I'm aware that it's coming to an end. I'm enjoying every day, taking in as much as I can, and being grateful for having the opportunity to love so much that it hurts to let go. I keep wishing there was some way to hold on, to go back and start sooner, to have more time. That's not possible, and even if it was, nothing is forever. Something that has been helping me feel better is being grateful. I'm struggling to let go of something I've had the privilege of experiencing, and it's helped me grow in so many ways. My life is better because of it, I've learned, and I get to treasure the memories from here on out. Because of it, I've got new opportunities, I don't know who I'll meet or where I'll go, but I've got this background now. 

I love where I've been, where I'm at, and will love where I go. It's all part of my story.